Alejandro Pastor

After four successful episodes of The Minority Report, Kevin and Andy decided that it was time to do a spinoff. This spinoff, titled “New Challengers have Appeared!” introduced three new characters to the Kinda Funny Roster: Andy Cortez’s Alejandro Pastor (also known as “El Pastor”), Joey Noelle’s Joé Navidad, and Kevin Coello’s El Americano Mama Leche.

As revealed late in the episode, El Pastor grew up in the dark, dirty streets of McAllen, Texas - deep within the depths of the Rio Grande Valley, where playing games is not considered socially acceptable. El Pastor attempted to play them anyways, and was outcast from his community as result, forcing everyone to fight in the congress offices - including the mother of Mama Leche (Grandmama Leche). This initially prompted Mama Leche to put on the mask and fight back - but in the end, the two wrestlers were able to put aside their differences and team up, after realizing that they stood for the same values.

It's unclear whether or not Alejandro Pastor - as his name implies - is also an ordained minister. All that is known for certain is that Pastor will refuse to rest until evil is vanquished from this mortal coil - and that his signature move, the Jesús Hairstripper, is believed to have been what caused Kevin to lose all of his beard hair on that one, unfortunate day in 2017.